I went on another date tonight with a perfectly suitable man. He was nice and fun and I felt like I didn't offend him too much with my sense of humor or with my language. He carried the conversation well, was considerate and polite and generally wonderful. And I wasn't attracted to him. Not in the least. He, like the hot doctor, is a "good catch" and a good person and not bad looking to boot. He could be my new friend and we could do stuff together but I do not want to hump him. Not even in the future. I feel this way about all the guys that I've emailed on match.com.
Which bring me back to this: My original purpose on match.com was to research the kind of person I want in my life and the kind of person I am attracted to (physically and in the law-of-attraction kind of way).
In the law-of-attraction kind of way, I am attracted to sane stable people who are a little bit unusual.
In the sexual attraction kind of way, I am attracted to idiots and psychos.
Before I started this blog, I had pretty much exclusively dated idiots, psychos and freeloaders. Now, I can safely say that I have dated nice guys.
And I know for sure that I am no longer a desperate dater!
But the person I am attracted to most is still myself. I just haven't met anyone who I a) want to hump and b) is a tiny bit awesome-er than me.
Either I am totally self involved to the point of becoming a psycho idiot myself OR I am finally living my real life and loving it! And I don't need anyone to lead the way or pay the bills or even to bump nasties with.
*Its just so hard to be co-dependent when you're as competent as I am!*