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Friday, May 8, 2009

Getting Excited About Nothing

I am in bed at 11:30 at night and I am getting very excited about a peanut butter and jelly sandwich.  I squirm around and kick my legs in anticipation. 

So while I don't know exactly how I want to live my totally-wide-open-wonderful-single-life, I do know what I want to eat. 

Never before in my life have I felt such freedom to not only do what I want with my life but to do good in the world with my life. My decisions and my dreams are at the moment 100% my own. All the folks for whom I spent years of my youth caring for are either grown up or passed away. I am healthy and the people in my life are well. Now I just have to figure out what to do now that I get to just live by myself. 

Which, lately, has been 100% overwhelming. I get all excited about my peanut butter and jelly sandwich and then I go online and google "peanut butter and jelly sandwich" and I find out that I am truly an idiot. There is so much to be learned about eating PB&Js that I am simply a beginner, an amateur. And if I really want to make something of this whole sandwich thing, I need to study the ins and outs of jelly including the jellies of the world including chutneys which includes reading all novels which contain the letter "J". This does not include an extensive observation and charting of my own toe jam. In regards to the peanut butter component, there is a art and science to peanut butter which requires living for 5 years on an organic peanut farm and riding elephants in the circus. 

If I really want a PB&J, it seems that I must give my entire life to understanding anything and everything about this delicious treat. 

But I don't want to commit my entire life to a sandwich. I just want to enjoy eating it. 

So I go into the kitchen and realize that what I really really want is a peanut butter and honey sandwich. So all that toe jam charting was for naught. 

**The above post is a sampling of the state of my brain and writing capacity these days. 

6 comments:

onely.org said...

PB&Js before bed are SO FABULOUS. Also, tomato and butter sandwiches. Make sure to have some protein too though, so your blood sugar doesn't spike and wake you up later. = )

These are habits from my insomnia days. . .

CC

Susan Walsh said...

I just laughed so suddenly and loudly I startled the dog. I love the image of you squirming and kicking your legs in anticipation of a PB&J. Singlutionary, you are a funny one.

The Singlutionary said...

I am glad I entertain with my midnight snack antics. Christina, I rarely eat late because it does keep me up when I do. So does drinking (any time of day) which is a huge bummer. One glass of wine causes me to toss and turn all night. I think this is a sign that my 20s are officially waning.

Stevi said...

haha I love this. I especially love you researching PB&J's. It makes me want a PB&Banana sandwich!

The Singlutionary said...

Stevi, I lurve PB&Bannana sandwiches. I had one for breakfast the morning after this post. Super naughty. Double PB&J/Bananna weekend!

bobbyboy said...

This may take you by surprise, but I think this is your best post yet. True, on face value it's a post about a sandwich, but oh numerous lessons to be learned. Ok, I have been eating peanut butter and jelly sandwich's almost every night for about 6 Months, yet never even thought to google it-you are shear genius :)

I would post more on this topic for the ages, but I'm actually going to go and have that peanut butter and jelly sandwich!